Thursday, April 12, 2007

"My mind is a junkyard"

That quote always comforts me. Not because of its meaning, but because no matter what I lose in the piles of rusted-out ideas, broken dreams and assorted bits of thought, I always remember that quote, that it's a Robert Heinlein quote, and if I think about it for a bit, I will remember that it's from Citizen of the Galaxy.

Junkyards can be vexatious--it's easy to lose stuff in the mess. On the other hand, it is all in there somewhere, it's just a matter of finding it. Unfortunately, I have a lot of moments when I am looking for the old chair that is the rules for closing a guardianship and instead I find the broken toaster which is the list of forms needed for opening a land sale.

I can't blame the MS for my mental deficiences. I've always been sort of scatter-brained and deficient in the area of attention span (and no, I am not going to make the "Look! Something shiny!" joke here now. It's been done.) and it hasn't gotten noticeably worse. I do sometimes worry that I'm less mentally acute, but if I am rational about it, I have to admit that whatever lesions I have aren't really affecting my mental functions. Physically, I still have to deal with the neuropathy, which has gotten a bit worse since I went off the copaxone, and I still have occasional olfactory hallucinations.

That last one weirded out Nurse Tardy when I mentioned it two years ago, so I didn't mention it to the new nurse practitioner when I went in for my annual in January. I know I'm not alone--my interwebbinet friend Crimmie has them too, although her neuro issues stem from a car accident rather than MS. One of these days, I'll stop by Jooly's and see if anybody else smells things that aren't there.

Of course, that assumes that I can remember what I wanted to ask everyone after we've gone through the obligatory round of greetings and reminding folks who I am since I'm not a terribly regular visitor.


Sherri said...

Be comforted. There are plenty of people with memory location problems who don't have any excuse whatsoever :D

Snicker the annoying one said...

I think you misunderstand your problem. It's not that you smell things that are not there, it's that there are things there that you smell but can't see.

Still vexing I tell you.

Jammies said...

The freakiest one was when I smelled chocolate chip cookies in Ohio just as your SO took a batch out of the oven in Indiana.

Snicca said...

Smellaportation is a concept borne from that incident.

Rob said...

Oh yes. The gigantic rummage sale that is the human mind is a concept I'm quite familiar with. ;)