Sunday, December 31, 2006

The Alphabet Game, Blogger edition.

From Guin:

A - Available/Single? Yes.
B - Best Friend? Stacey, Sherri, Amy
C - Cake or Pie? Carrot cake.
D - Drink Of Choice? Water or Diet coke.
E - Essential Item You Use Everyday? Bathtub.
F - Favorite Color? Hunter Green.
G - Gummy Bears Or Worms? Gumdrops, please.
H - Hometown? Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio.
I - Indulgence? Lush, garden plants, bubble gum for the brain novels.
J - January Or February? February--I may be single, but I love decorating for Valentine's.
K - Kids & Their Names? Furkids are Stormy and Beau, aka Bigfoot & Littlefoot.
L - Life Is Incomplete Without? Family, friends, and furry critters.
M - Marriage date? N/A.
N - Number Of Siblings? Two younger brothers.
O - Oranges Or Apples? Jonagold or Pink Lady apples.
P - Phobias/Fears? Spiders, fire.
Q - Favorite Quote? "You want feminine proctection? Get an Akita Bitch." Susan Conant.
R - Reason to Smile? My family, my dogs, my friends, my garden, my Lush.
S - Season? Autumn.
T - Tag 3 or 4 people? If you read this, you're tagged.
U - Unknown Fact About Me? When I'm approaching a stoplight, I cross my toes to keep it green.
V - Vegetable you don't like? Almost all cooked vegetables.
W - Worst Habit? Not dusting.
X - X-rays You've Had? Hips, knees, spinal & head MRIs.
Y - Your Favorite Food? Chocolate, steak, pasta.
Z - ? Zarathustra--R. Strauss. Memories of watching "2001" with my dad & brothers.

Dinner with Doc

Last night, I had dinner with my oldest friend. She's not old, it's just that we've known each other for 35 years. *grin* We had a lovely Mexican dinner at Mariachi Loco, came back to my house and exchanged presents, and talked about bath products, gardening, mothers, mutual friends, family, etc. I had thought beforehand about reminding her not to wear black pants because of the dogs, but she's got a PhD, she should have remembered. Then we were standing in line at the restaurant and I looked, and sure enough--black pants. Thank goodness she's got a sense of humor and a calm, balanced outlook. At the house, she petted the dogs without ever once showing any kind of worry for the layer of fur they were leaving on her.

I told her at dinner she was going to shoot me for one of her presents, by which I meant that I had three Lush bubble bars for her and she would probably get addicted. By the time she opened her bag of bath products and her box with pjs and slippers, I'd forgotten what I said at dinner, and I was too busy being excited about my new fragranced oil burner, candle and linen spray (all in lavender *blissful sigh*) to explain even if I had remembered. The phone rang about half an hour after she left, and she asked, "Why am I going to shoot you? I've been trying to think why the whole way home!" I explained, she laughed, and we said goodnight.

Whether or not I started Doc on a Lush addiction, my own is going to take a back seat for the next few months. Not only because I am still upset with the recent crappy customer service, but because it's time for my gardening addiction to be fed. So far, I'm up to about a $130.00 order from the Jung Seed catalog, including viburnum, butterfly bushes, phlox, lily-of-the-valley (in PINK!) and gladiolus, among others. That will be my next extravagance, and Lush can just do without my money for a while.

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Bobby Terry, you SCROOOOED UP!

That's a quote from "The Stand," by Stephen King. When Bobby Terry accidentally shoots the Judge in the face, Randall Flagg is a bit upset, and Bobby winds up a bit dead. Right now, I rather wish I could chew up the folks at Lush's online division.

See, they had this wonderful, amazing sale on Christmas Day, and didn't tell anyone about it--you pretty much had to be on the computer and visiting the Lush website right on Christmas to benefit. From what I've read, they gave away some amazing stuff. But, okay, I don't need to spend any more money, I placed an order right before Christmas, and although I was miffed at how they handled the sale, I've made my peace with it.

That is, until today, when I was notified that three of the items I ordered at 10:30 a.m. PST on Friday, December 22nd, were out of stock (and since they were Christmas items, there won't be any more, unless Lush decides to make the same item next year). Of course, Lush didn't get my order ready for shipping until today, six days AFTER I posted my order, and some of the folks who benefited from the sale got FREE Holidays (my item).

To say I'm a bit miffed is putting it mildly. Frankly, right now I want Randy Flagg's teeth.

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

From the mouths of babes

Two funny comments from my six year old nephew:

His four year old brother had a bit of a meltdown when his last Christmas present, a car, didn't make noise. His older brother looked up from his final present, a construction set, and said, "Well, I'm not all that thrilled with this one, either."

Later in the day, as the six year old was playing with his Floam, he called out, "Mom, this isn't squishy or stretchy--the commercial lied!"

Monday, December 25, 2006

The Loot, Part II


From parents:

A black velvet pantsuit
A white & black flowered skirt with a black, short-sleeved sweater
A brown shirt with a turquoise fun fur scarf with fuzzy cream/brown yarn knitted into it that my mom knitted for me
Holiday, Christingly and Greenwing
Turquoise striped shirt
Short-sleeved denim shirt
Black gauze peasant blouse
A copy of this book, signed by the author, who's a friend of my parents.

From one brother & his family:
A gorgeous, sheer magenta peasant top
An equally gorgeous black sweater
A framed picture of my nephews
A book of short stories by Susannah Clarke

From the other brother & his family:
Puddy Holly, Ne Worry Pas, Creamy Candy and Christmas Day
Freshwater pearl earrings and two necklaces made by my sister-in-law


To my dad:
A hunter green fleece jacket
Two bags of chocolate-drizzled caramel corn
Set of four martini glasses with bright blue twisted stems

To my mom:
Blue jammies & fuzzy slippers
Handmade stoneware cheese plate & matching knife
Funky glittery egg-shaped Santa
Little velvet Santa pillow on a golden cord.

To my nephews:
For the six year old, a M&Ms truck/candy dispenser and his first digital camera
For the four year old, two popup travelling Matchbox play sets

To my nieces:
For the three and a half year old, a dress up box
For the 11 month old, two winter outfits

To my brother in Columbus:
A pooping reindeer and a set of martini glasses with their own ice holders

To my brother in Dallas:
A Cleveland Browns book & a check

To my sister-in-law in Columbus:
A set of pink and black jammies & fuzzy black slippers
A leopard-print dress
A kitchen message board with a background of happy chefs

And for some reason, I can't remember what I sent my sister-in-law in Dallas (it's late and I'm tired).

Still have to exchange presents with two of my friends, and then Christmas will be over.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

That's IT

Neither Rob nor The Heather have received their Christmas boxes. I am sending Snicker to Toronto.

Canada Post won't know what hit 'em.

Now I want the piggie!

Before I start talking about presents I have received, I will say that I am happy that all the boxes going to various spots in the U.S. have arrived, and more than a bit worried about the Canadian presents. If either of my Canuck friends have gotten a box, could you let me know? And if not, I shall have to send the Snicker to Canada to intimidate Canadian postal workers.

Thanks to all of my lovely friends for my wonderful Christmas pressies! *beeg hugs*

Thursday night, I came home from work and saw a small package on my stoop. When opened, it turned out to be an adorable, soft-furred little otter from Captain Spaulding. Oscar the otter wears a t-shirt for the Erie Otters, and has a tail that looks like a beaver tail, but he's still adorable. And soft, omidog he's soft--I kept rubbing him against my cheek.

Friday when I got home from work, there was a box bigger than Littlefoot on the stoop. By Friday night, I was considering putting Littlefoot in the box, punching some air holes and marking it "Return to Sender." That Box contained Christmas pressies from Mallie & The Scarecrow. They sent me a very funny sweatshirt (It's uncredible how well I am with grammer), an mp3 player, a plush otter, a plush red-eyed tree frog, a DVD/VCR, 3 DVDs, seven books and two dog toys. Also included were four Sunnyside bubble bars from The Heather, in an actual Lush bag from an actual Lush store. Yes, I'm saving the bag--if you didn't already know I was dorky, read the entry before this one.

I'm currently giggling and snorting my way through "Interior Desecrations," and, as predicted in comments on Scott's blog, saying to myself, "This is what she thinks of me?" They also sent me an book on frogs and toads which states right on the cover that it is authoritative and illustrated --after all, what point is a reference work if it's not authoritative?

And the dog toys. Ahhh, yes. One stuffed squeaky pink piggie (memories of my prior experience with undead stuffed piggies) and one very fluffy squeaky stuffed sheep. I gave Littlefoot the sheep and Bigfoot the piggie, and spent the rest of the evening listening to the canine equivalent of "Hey, I like the sheep better. Gimme!" "Fine, I'll take the piggie!" "Now I want the piggie!"

Thursday, December 21, 2006

By request

Lush has a message board, and one of the subforums is "Lush P*o*r*n," wherein members post pictures of their Lush stashes. I decided to do something a bit different for my stash thread, and Sherri requested that I share it here so she doesn't have to join the Lush board.

A Lush Fairy Tale

Cast of Characters (in order of appearance):

Peasants: Tisty Tosty
King Frank: Blue Skies
Queen Cosi: The Comforter
Princess Herbaceous: French Kiss
Visiting Princes: Ceridwen, Avobath, Wish Upon A Star
Prince Sonny: Sunny Side
Guards: Wiccy
Ladies in Waiting: Holiday(s)
Gentlemen of the Court: Christmas Kisses(es)
Blob Monster Supervisors: Old Blue Skies
Blob Monsters: Christingly(s)
Mysterious Wise Old Wizard: Amandapondo
Magistrate: Think Pink

Once upon a time, there was a small kingdom named Bathtopia. The peasants were happy in their hovels.

King Frank and Queen Cosi doted upon their beautiful adopted daughter, Princess Herbaceous, who everyone just called “Herbi.”

The Princess was very picky (and more than a little spoiled), and no matter how many eligible young men visited the castle, she turned up her nose at them.

One day, Princess Herbi was out riding her pet dragon.

She met a mysterious young man.

He said he was Prince Sonny, from a neighboring kingdom. Because he hadn’t been paraded in front of her as a possible husband, she liked him, and he seemed to like her too. They started meeting every day on their rides, and soon they fell in love.

When Princess Herbi took Prince Sonny to meet her parents, they were shocked and appalled!

“NO!” said the King and Queen. “You may NOT marry him! Your children will smell disgusting! And they’ll be glittery!”

They sent Prince Sonny away and locked Princess Herbi up with her ladies-in-waiting. Princess Herbi wept and screamed and laid on the floor holding her breath until she turned purple, but the King and the Queen were adamant.

That night, she tried to sneak out of the castle, so her parents sent her away to a remote location guarded by blob monsters.

When Prince Sonny arrived at the castle the next day, the King and the Queen gloated that Princess Herbi was out of reach and had their guard throw him out. He went home and consulted his childhood mentor, the Wise Old Wizard.

The Wise Old Wizard consulted his charts, did a spell, and said he could find Princess Herbi, but Prince Sonny should bring all his friends to fight the blob monsters.

After a long and arduous ride, Prince Sonny, his friends and the Wise Old Wizard arrived at the secret castle where Princess Herbi was held prisoner.

They battled the blob monsters.

There was carnage on both sides.

It was ugly.

But they were victorious!

Princess Herbi flew from the castle into Prince Sonny’s arms.

“Oh, my love, you rescued me!”

“Yes, my precious, and we shall never be separated again!”

Prince Sonny had even brought a magistrate to marry them on the spot.

They returned to Bathtopia, and told the King and the Queen what had happened.

The Queen fainted.

The King yelled.

But eventually, they threw a grand ball to celebrate.

They all lived happily ever after.

Even if Princess Herbi and Prince Sonny did in fact have stinky, glittery children.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

The Loot, Part I

My very favorite camelid, Evil Alpaca, sent me the Saving Jane CD with my new theme song on it. That arrived on Monday.

Today was our office Christmas luncheon, and I think everyone liked their gifts. I know Snoopy loved his pooping reindeer, and Goldilocks really liked her Steelers piggy bank. We had a very lovely lunch, and I came home loaded with great loot. Snoopy got me a $20 gift card for Yankee Candle, which will buy lots of lovely wax tarts to melt, Goldilocks got me a Greenwing bath ballistic, Christmas Kisses and Creamy Candy bubble bars and a Twinkle ballistic from Lush, and some Warm Vanilla Sugar body butter that everyone at the table wanted to eat. Vegan Lawyer got me a gorgeous burnt velvet shawl in black with sparkly beading all over it--I'm going to wear it to work tomorrow over my bright green silk blazer. The boss gave me a beautiful pair of silver earrings with bright blue glass and $250.00.

The Inn at Turner's Mill wasn't the best choice of lunch venue for a vegan & a vegetarian, but the three meat-eaters were happy. I had the medallions of beef, as did Goldilocks, and Snoopy had the butternut squash pasta with chorizo. Next year, we'll probably go back to Blue Canyon. Still, we had a great time, and I think I've got VL interested in Lush. And I know if she tries it, she'll be addicted. *grin*

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Instant gratification

Much to my surprise, almost all of the US packages I mailed on Saturday arrived at their destinations on Monday. While a few people are determined to wait until Christmas to open their pressies, MissJett and the Alpaca both opened their boxes last night, and then let me know that I chose well.

I adore giving presents. If I had loads of money, that would be all I would do all the time. :-D

Monday, December 18, 2006

And now the hard part

Imp, Sherri and Captain Spaulding all have their boxes.

Now I have to WAIT for people to open boxes.

Ack! I hate waiting!

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Christmas P.O.

The post office opens at 8:30, so I was there at 8:15. I had to make three trips with my boxes, setting them on the customer counter at the end closest to the registers (which weren't open yet). As I was making my third trip, a gentleman came in with one box, and I insisted he stand in front of me since he only had one box. In return, he insisted on carrying my last three packages inside from my car. We chatted for a while, and then were joined by a lady with one box who said the post office should have coffee and Christmas music for people waiting. I said that I work in a retail/office building, and if I hear "Santa Baby" one more time, I'm liable to go on a rampage. Both of my conversation partners snorted.

By the time the metal divider was rolled up, there was a line behind the three of us stretching all the way to the door, and this is a big post office. While the gentleman in front of me was paying for his postage, I started moving boxes to the clerk's counter. While I was on my second set of three, a clerk opened up the register next to the first one. The redhead at the first register said snottily, "You are supposed to wait until you are called. He wasn't ready for you yet." I tried to explain that I was just getting my packages within reach in order to speed up the process, but fell over my own tongue. Anyway, the clerk who helped me, a very nice man named Reggie, could not have been sweeter. He weighed the packages to Canada first, so I could fill out the customs forms while he weighed everything else, and helped me get the least expensive shipping that would still get everything there by Christmas.

When I explained that one package wasn't fragile but it was meltable, he weighed it, put the postage on it and set it aside so he could mark it later to keep away from heat. Although the natives behind me were restless, Reggie was an absolute doll throughout the entire transaction. I apologized to him for what looked like jumping the gun, and managed to use the correct words when telling him I was trying to expedite things. He said that he's used to people being cranky at the holidays, and I wondered if he meant customers or the snotty redhead. *grin*

When I left the post office, eighty-six dollars later, I was pretty sure I was the most hated person there, even if the redheaded clerk is a bitch.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Ms. CraftyButt

The fruits of several nights' labor, all laid out and ready to wrap & pack:

The pale yellow is raspberry lemonade, the purple bath salts are lavender, the light purple soaps & fizzies are pearberry, the deep red is carnation/rose, the dark purple soaps are cherry, the yellow/green soaps are lemongrass, the pale orange is spiced citrus, the bright blue is peppermint and the dark red/cream/orange are various combos of clove, cinnamon, orange and vanilla.

Off to pack all this stuff for shipping! :-)

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

So much for Wednesday

This was supposed to be my night to gloat over all the stuff I've done, and post pictures of all my neato bath products I've made since Sunday. Since the slugs are totally kicking my ass today, I decided just to post some pics of the brats.

Monday, December 11, 2006

So it's Monday

And there were bad things and good things.

The biggest bad thing was, of course, just the sheer existence of Monday. It didn't help that I very much enjoyed having Captain Crossword in town for the weekend, and taking him to the airport on Sunday made me sad. We had a wonderful dinner Saturday night at Russo's--great food and even better company. Dad & CC both ordered Maker's Mark manhattans, and the drinks came in glasses a beta fish would be happy swimming in. *chuckle* Mom had iced tea and the four cheese spinach ravioli, and the rest of us had the chicken-fried steak, which was made with beef tenderloin and absolutely wonderful.

Sunday morning, Mom put on a lavish brunch spread for ten people (family and 3 couples who are old friends) and we all enjoyed the meal and the conversation. It was an absolutely beautiful day, so the driving part to the airport was nice, and it did give me an extra forty-five minutes alone with my brother, but I couldn't watch him go into the terminal. Lest you think I'm being stickily sentimental, I must confess that instead of waving goodbye to him I was trying to readjust the driver's seat of Dad's car from a position comfortable for a six foot one person to one comfy for me at my mere five foot five.

So in addition to having to return to work after a very wonderful weekend, there was all the usual stuff--a gazillion phone messages, checks to write, data entry on an accounting (and I totally forgot to do the shredding, so I have to do that tomorrow). But I woke up to a very clean house, Vegan Lawyer told me she can see me shrinking, which was a nice compliment, the anarchist animals are back, the new Blowfish catalog is out, and I got an amusing wrong number on my cell phone. I don't dare brag about Monday being easy--the last time I did that, seven things went wrong between 7 p.m. and bedtime, and I still have to make soap, but I will say that it could have been worse.

Brutally honest personality test.

Take it here.

Loner - ISFP
46% Extraversion, 40% Intuition, 33% Thinking, 46% Judging
Ahh...the sweet serenity. The utter perfection of all creation. The wondrous beauty of nature. The sweet sparrow singing along in the great orchestra we call life...
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? You're the type of person people always love to mock because they don't believe there's anyone ACTUALLY like you.

Do realise that you ostracise people with your behaviour or is it all subconscious? You're so quiet and reserved it's almost impossible to get to know you well, and when someone finally does, all you want to talk about is grace and beauty and harmony!

Ugh. Sure, you "genuinely care for others" and all that rubbish, but when it boils right down to the basics you take life far too seriously.

Throughout the entire test, I bet you were searching for "further clarification and hidden meaning" so that you might improve your pitiful life. And woe and behold if it betrayed your intense values system!

You need to STOP smelling the daisies. Believe it or not, logic does have a place in this world...imbecile.

Hmmm. Some of it fits, some of it doesn't. Kinda like life in all of its deep grace and beauty and harmony. :p

Sunday, December 10, 2006

My new theme song

"Imperfection" by Saving Jane

You can listen to the song here (Just click on the link for "Imperfection").

My hair's a wreck
Mascara runs
My feet get dirty and my skin burns in the sun

My lips, they bleed
But I still sing my songs
Takes me a minute to admit it when I'm wrong

Pretty is as pretty does, but pretty's not my thing...

This is what you get
This is who I am
Take me now or leave me
Any way you can
Sometimes I trip and fall
But I know where I stand
And if you're thinking about changing my direction...
Don't mess with Imperfection.

My back is weak
But my will is true
Got good intentions but I never follow through
I say too much
Don't know when to leave
In case you're looking that's my heart there on my sleeve

Ego trips and stupid slipups, I'm a mess but..

This is what you get
This is who I am
Take me now or leave me
Any way you can
Sometimes I trip and fall
But I know where I stand
And if you're thinking about changing my direction...
Don't mess with Imperfection.

Scratched and bruised, a little used,
But baby, I work fine.
You might call me damaged goods,
But I'm one of a kind.

My hair's a wreck
Mascara runs
No, I'm not perfect, but I'm not the only one...

This is what you get
This is who I am
Take me now or leave me
Any way you can
Sometimes I trip and fall
But I know where I stand
And if you're thinking about changing my direction...
Don't mess with Imperfection.

I love the music for this song, and the lyrics are me, completely. Unfortunately, it's not on Saving Jane's only album. However, they're from Columbus and my brother might know someone who knows someone who might know someone in the band so he can find out if this is for an upcoming album and let me know when it will be released. I will definitely be buying it.

Saturday, December 09, 2006

I like lists

I like to-do lists, Christmas lists, lists of books, lists of things I didn't know about people, shopping lists, all kinds of lists. So here are today's lists:

Things I have done this week:

Emptied 24 boxes of crap which have sat since I moved in here two years ago
Washed, dried and put away almost all of the crap
Winnowed out enough things to donate one box of crap to Goodwill
Hauled all the empty boxes out with the trash

Things I have done today:

Moved the living room furniture around
Hauled one nonfunctional speaker and two nonfunctional lamps out to the garage for disposal on Thursday
Moved Goodwill box to garage to be donated in January (taxes)
Cleaned off the peninsula counter and the kitchen table
Vacuumed the living room, eating area and breezeway
One load of laundry washed and now in the dryer, one load folded and put away
Compost taken out
Three wreaths hung
Houseplants watered
Made a to-do list
Posted to my blog (hey, two in one! *grin*)

Things I still need to do:

Wash the kitchen & bathroom floors
Scrub the tub, toilet and bathroom sink
Change my sheets
Hide my "toys"
Take a shower
Eat lunch
Maybe take a nap

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

What are the odds?

Yesterday morning, I asked VL (Vegan Lawyer) how her weekend was, and she said Saturday was great and Sunday sucked. Saturday night, she was walking from one mini-barn to the other (feeding the goat and the horse) and she walked right into a tree branch, which poked her in the eye. She spent Sunday feeling dizzy, nauseous and pained all day. We talked about how miserable a poke in the eye is, and I told her about the two times it's happened to me, then she told me about the other time it's happened to her. Back when I was still living with my parents, we were having a bonfire and Dad stepped on one end of a tree branch, which whipped the other end up and across my eye, and then about four or five years ago, I bent over to pick up a tomato plant and jabbed my eye right down on one of the stakes.

So last night, I go to fluff up the pillow shams on my bed, and manage to flick a corner of one sham across my right eyeball. Pain, pain, pain, OH PAIN, ow ow ow. I had ice on it all evening and it still hurts today, and I have a headache.

Honestly, what are the odds?

Christmas tag

From the lovely Guin. It's a simple tag, asking for Christmas lists. Here are my top ten wishes, in no particular order:

1. A copy of everything Terry Pratchett has written.

2. Enough money to give my friend Snicker a huge tract of land and a no-kill shelter on it.

3. Someone to go with me when I kidnap certain dogs I've seen spending their lives on chains and deliver them to said no-kill shelter.

4. A new car. Nothing fancy, a new Saturn wagon would be lovely.

5. A Lush store in Akron, and funds for several years' worth of spending therein.

6. For a friend to get an acceptance to college in Canada, tuition funds for said friend, and vacation money for he and his wife to visit here and for me to visit them in Toronto.

7. For my brother to get his job in Akron, followed by his wife finding a job here and then them moving here with my adorable nieces.

8. For my friends and family to live forever.

9. Ditto #8 for my dogs.

10. Enough money to add a deck and some extra square footage on to my house, and to add my dream bathroom in the new footage.

Sherri, Jay, Brendan, and Scott may all consider themselves tagged. :-p

Sunday, December 03, 2006


I've been working flat-out since 9 this morning, and every single room in this house is a MESS. Between yesterday and today, I emptied twenty boxes of crap which were hiding behind the boxes of books; washed everything I want to keep; created a box for Goodwill and hauled lots of crap out to the garage for disposal on Thursday night. Today, I've washed, dried, folded and put away 3 loads of laundry; I have one in the washer and one in the dryer and four left to go. I've vacuumed the library; changed my bedskirt and comforter to my Christmas ones; changed the sheets on the bed and run the dishwasher.

However, I still haven't scrubbed the tub, toilet and sink, vacuumed anywhere but in the library, swept & mopped the kitchen floor, taken out the compost or rearranged the living room furniture the way I want it. I think my problem is that I keep doing bits and pieces of chores, so they never seem to be done.

I need a break, so it's naptime for a while. Then I will go right back to work. Monday is looking pretty good right now.