Something new

I finally decided to get off my butt and start a second blog for all of my "girly" stuff. I'm calling it Bubbles and Baubles, and I will be using it for all the things that make me squee in an embarrassing fashion.

Spring Snobservations

While standing in line at the Grand Opening of Lush Beachwood and eavesdropping:

Thought 1 about the lady in front of me:

Beeyotch, you can't pass yourself off as an expert Lushie if you keep saying things like "The Olive Vine" and "Witchy Muscles."

Thought 2 about the lady in front of me:

Oh, good gods, you're SORRY they disconned Red Rooster? You need to be forced to wear a muzzle lest you share your views any further. And you should probably be sterilized immediately for the good of humanity.

Thought about the SA helping me:

Oh dear. She's so sweet and helpful, and they're all working flat-out as hard as they can but eeeeeek she needs a Tic-Tac, stat.

Thought about the young woman stomping out of the mall:

Yes, there's a line. It's a small store and they advertised the Grand Opening. They also said it was going to start at 5 p.m. and there was a line at 5:15 when I got here. If you stay in line, you get a Lush cookie and a limited edition Grand Opening ballistic, just for waiting in line. If you spend $45, you get a goodie bag.

However, if you stand in line for a few minutes, find that the line isn't moving fast enough for you and storm out like a dinosaur on steroids exclaiming at the top of your lungs about how ridiculous it is to wait in line and how you're only ordering online and how you're never setting foot in the store blah blah blah, not only do you not get any of the freebies, nor do you get to snuggle your Lush from the minute you get it, but you also set yourself up to pay shipping fees and you made people watching you sad, because nobody would take a line that personally and make that big a fuss if there weren't something else terribly wrong in their life. I almost followed you and gave you my goodie bag, I felt so awful for you.

Thoughts while driving:

To the dude on the motorcycle:

Tuck your damn t-shirt in when you're going to be doing 60 mph. It's orange, it's flapping like a flag in a hurricane, and nobody wants to see that much flabby white flesh.

To the cute blonde chick in the cute little Toyota:

That really is a cute little car--why did you have to put the decal on the back window that is supposed to make us think someone threw a soccer ball at your car and it broke the window and got stuck halfway through? It's dumb and it ruins the car.

Final thought:

Do I hoard my LE ballistic like the treasure that it is? Perhaps sleep on it the way a dragon does gold? Or do I use it and see if it has the magical $100 gift card inside? Or do I start a poll on the Lush forum to see what I should do with it?

Auntie Social

This has been an unusually social weekend for me, and I'm actually glad it rained enough to prevent Josh & Amy from coming over to do the lawn.

Saturday morning started with some last-minute cleaning and then a shower before MaryMargrt from the Lush message board got here. We talked and traded sniffables for a while (she brought me the sweetest basket full of discontinued Lush, new Lush not available here yet and stuff from other etailers) then headed over to her parents' house, where there was some more talking, and a lot of petting of the two German Shepards (who are utterly adorable). After that, we went up to Beachwood to the brand-new Cleveland Lush store, YAAAAAY!

I managed to stay pretty close to my budget. It helped that I won a bubble bar and a bath bomb for answering two trivia questions correctly, and that there were goodie bags and free ballistics for those who spent over $40. I got a Fresh-Faced starter kit for combination skin, three French Kisses, a Golden Slumbers and a free Sugar Rush ballistic. The store had samples of the discontinued items to sniff, but I'm going to have to sniff some of the stuff over again when I go to the Grand Opening on Thursday night, as my nose burned out halfway through and I couldn't smell anything from any of the shower gels. I am definitely going to order lots of Ice Hotel and Flowertub bubble bars, if nothing else.

While we were there, we met KellyGirl, Carla, Maresche, Meabh and HeyLookAMidget from the board, and when everyone had done their shopping, everyone except Carla headed over to the Cheesecake Factory for lunch. Everybody is exactly like their forum personalities, only moreso, which is a very good thing. MaryMargret is thoughtful, sweet and open; Midgie looks exactly like her avatar, and is a sweet and funny girl with a secret addiction to carnival food; KellyGirl is a smart & sassy blonde with an engaging smile and an infectious laugh, Maresche is the perfect advertisement for Lush henna and a charming lunch companion and Meabh started out shy but warmed up and started getting silly with us pretty quickly. Midgie brought out a giant enabler's bag and passed it around twice, saying she didn't want to take anything home, and we talked and joked and it was as if we were meeting for the zillionth time rather than the first. MaryMargrt has to go back to NJ, but I think the rest of us will be there for the Grand Opening.

This morning, MaryMargrt came over for a bit and we made her custom strawberry Wet Willy and yakked about everything under the sun while it hardened. Sunday morning is usually my cleaning time, so it was a real treat to have the cleaning already done and just be able to sit around and chat. However, I have to admit that this weekend was a lot more in-person contact than I usually have, and so I was rather glad to be alone when she left at noon. So if I owe you a phone call or a Yahoo chat, please forgive me for hiding a little bit longer to recharge my sociability batteries.

Some pics from yesterday's meetup:












Back row, left to right: Me, MaryMargrt, KellyGirl, Maresche
Front row, left to right: Meabh, HeyLookAMidget

Bobby Terry, you SCROOOOED UP!

That's a quote from "The Stand," by Stephen King. When Bobby Terry accidentally shoots the Judge in the face, Randall Flagg is a bit upset, and Bobby winds up a bit dead. Right now, I rather wish I could chew up the folks at Lush's online division.

See, they had this wonderful, amazing sale on Christmas Day, and didn't tell anyone about it--you pretty much had to be on the computer and visiting the Lush website right on Christmas to benefit. From what I've read, they gave away some amazing stuff. But, okay, I don't need to spend any more money, I placed an order right before Christmas, and although I was miffed at how they handled the sale, I've made my peace with it.

That is, until today, when I was notified that three of the items I ordered at 10:30 a.m. PST on Friday, December 22nd, were out of stock (and since they were Christmas items, there won't be any more, unless Lush decides to make the same item next year). Of course, Lush didn't get my order ready for shipping until today, six days AFTER I posted my order, and some of the folks who benefited from the sale got FREE Holidays (my item).

To say I'm a bit miffed is putting it mildly. Frankly, right now I want Randy Flagg's teeth.

By request

Lush has a message board, and one of the subforums is "Lush P*o*r*n," wherein members post pictures of their Lush stashes. I decided to do something a bit different for my stash thread, and Sherri requested that I share it here so she doesn't have to join the Lush board.

A Lush Fairy Tale


Cast of Characters (in order of appearance):

Peasants: Tisty Tosty
King Frank: Blue Skies
Queen Cosi: The Comforter
Princess Herbaceous: French Kiss
Visiting Princes: Ceridwen, Avobath, Wish Upon A Star
Prince Sonny: Sunny Side
Guards: Wiccy
Ladies in Waiting: Holiday(s)
Gentlemen of the Court: Christmas Kisses(es)
Blob Monster Supervisors: Old Blue Skies
Blob Monsters: Christingly(s)
Mysterious Wise Old Wizard: Amandapondo
Magistrate: Think Pink

Once upon a time, there was a small kingdom named Bathtopia. The peasants were happy in their hovels.



King Frank and Queen Cosi doted upon their beautiful adopted daughter, Princess Herbaceous, who everyone just called “Herbi.”



The Princess was very picky (and more than a little spoiled), and no matter how many eligible young men visited the castle, she turned up her nose at them.





One day, Princess Herbi was out riding her pet dragon.



She met a mysterious young man.



He said he was Prince Sonny, from a neighboring kingdom. Because he hadn’t been paraded in front of her as a possible husband, she liked him, and he seemed to like her too. They started meeting every day on their rides, and soon they fell in love.



When Princess Herbi took Prince Sonny to meet her parents, they were shocked and appalled!



“NO!” said the King and Queen. “You may NOT marry him! Your children will smell disgusting! And they’ll be glittery!”

They sent Prince Sonny away and locked Princess Herbi up with her ladies-in-waiting. Princess Herbi wept and screamed and laid on the floor holding her breath until she turned purple, but the King and the Queen were adamant.



That night, she tried to sneak out of the castle, so her parents sent her away to a remote location guarded by blob monsters.



When Prince Sonny arrived at the castle the next day, the King and the Queen gloated that Princess Herbi was out of reach and had their guard throw him out. He went home and consulted his childhood mentor, the Wise Old Wizard.



The Wise Old Wizard consulted his charts, did a spell, and said he could find Princess Herbi, but Prince Sonny should bring all his friends to fight the blob monsters.

After a long and arduous ride, Prince Sonny, his friends and the Wise Old Wizard arrived at the secret castle where Princess Herbi was held prisoner.





They battled the blob monsters.





There was carnage on both sides.



It was ugly.



But they were victorious!



Princess Herbi flew from the castle into Prince Sonny’s arms.



“Oh, my love, you rescued me!”

“Yes, my precious, and we shall never be separated again!”

Prince Sonny had even brought a magistrate to marry them on the spot.



They returned to Bathtopia, and told the King and the Queen what had happened.

The Queen fainted.

The King yelled.

But eventually, they threw a grand ball to celebrate.





They all lived happily ever after.

Even if Princess Herbi and Prince Sonny did in fact have stinky, glittery children.