Tuesday, December 15, 2009

In which we learn that some people will stop at nothing.

Once upon a time, there was an international toe porn superstar named Spunky Labia. Spunky ruled the toe porn world with an iron foot, and thought she was secure.

Then, along came an upstart to challenge her, the beautiful, young, breathtakingly-pedicured Toesy Kerrigan.

Spunky was jealous, but in denial about her slow slide from superstardom to opening car shows.

On Monday night, as Toesy went to take a picture of her glamorous new coat of glittery green China Glaze Emerald Sparkle, a footstool leapt out from the shadows and bashed her with a thick piece of wood!

Toesy fell to the ground, crying, "Why me? Whyyyyyyyyyyy meeeeeeeeeeeeeee?"

The footstool is being held for questioning, and an unnamed source says that it is related to Spunky's ex-footstool.

Toesy's people released the following photograph, not for the faint of heart:

Clearly, international toe porn is a cutthroat business!


the queen said...

Spunky is outraged you would make this accusation. Was it a Stickley footstool? Those are the only footstools Spunky buys. Besides, Spunky is not threatened, because the followers of SpunkyLabia on Twitter have now swollen to seven if you count "jonisjackingoff."

Sherri said...

1) Ow!

2) Bwahaha!