Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Out of the closet

I finally told my boss and the other members of my team that I have MS. I've been having some memory problems lately, and they've affected my work. I've got a call into my neuro's office to ask about ALCAR or a prescription alternative. Everyone on my team has been very supportive. It turns out to be a good thing I 'fessed up--one of my co-workers was thinking that because the mistakes I made aren't understandable for someone "as smart as you are," she thought I had a drinking problem.

Coping with all of this lately has been hard, and last weekend, I allowed myself a good long wallow in depression and self-pity. That's pretty much over, but in today's mail there was one more reason to be grateful for all of the love and support I get from friends and family.

The back story:

Earlier this year, my friend Kogi did a gorgeous mug for a customer that was black and covered with roses. The pics were beautiful, and at some point after I saw them, I was on the phone with Kogi, and said that I wanted a rug with moses on it for myself. She said I might get one for Christmas and we kept talking. A minute or two later, the penny dropped, and I interrupted Kogi to ask "Did I just say I wanted a rug with moses? I meant a mug with roses!" Kogi had to stop and think about it, because she'd heard what I meant to say, not what I actually said.

Today, when I got home from work, there was a box from Colorado on my doorstep, containing the most beautiful rug with moses that I have ever seen. I'll take a picture and post it at some point, but right now, I just have to cuddle my present and think again how very lucky I am.


Stacey said...

They thought you drank, oh dear.

I am glad you told them.

Sherri said...

I wanna see the rug with moses, too!


BTW, Jay says if ever I get sick of him and move out, I'm supposed to move in with you so he can find me.

rogue said...

Jammies, I'm glad you told them, too. I've been pretty open about my neurological issues at work, because most of the people know me from my "pre-seizures" days. No one ever thought I was drinking, though 0_0

Oh, and my smartypants brother has made spoonerisms all his life. I think it's a sign of superior intelligence. *nods*

*huggles* for you and *scritches* for the 'foots

Romantic Heretic said...

*HUGS* Jammies. Good for you.

Becs said...

I think your timing was impeccable. Not too soon, not too late. And it's good to get it checked out of course, but there are all kinds of things that will play with your memory - stress, having way too big a 'to do' list, hate to say it but getting older will do it too.


the queen said...

I've never been able to keep my MS a secret. Life is much more relaxing when someone says "My sister was just diagnosed with MS and you can speak up."

Jammies said...

Stacey, "Oh dear" is a politer response than the giant guffaws which almost escaped me.

Sherri, you won't ever move out, but you're always welcome here. The 'Foots ask that you please bring at least one kitteh with you, though.

Roguey, my spoonerisms are usually a result of my trying to say way too much too fast--I'm a champion talker, but sometimes I overreach. The 'Foots thank you for the scritches and ask if you could keep me from taking them to the vet tomorrow. ;-)

Thanks, Rob. I'm still a little surprised at how oddly easy it was to finally come clean.

Becs, thanks. Hearing your opinion of my timing means a great deal. I agree about the stress and the workload and the aging, and I'm sure that all comes into play. The trick will be seeing how much is environmental and how much, if any of it, is MS.

Your Majesty, I get the feeling you're not a huge secret-keeper anyway. *grin* I did answer some very basic questions about "What is MS and how do you know you have it?" from a co-worker today. Then she helped me fix some coding.

*hugs* for everyone and I love you all.

Mister Fantalastical Chickn said...

i still finks u need a chickn....