Some days I wish I were a dog

Little Miss Piggie Pie is sleeping on the floor by my chair, blissfully ignorant of the nasty things called "consequences" which have plagued me all day.  It's not that they don't apply to her, just that she doesn't think that far ahead.

Ignore your laundry for two weeks, get a Horta on the basement floor (image courtesy of Mallie)
Smoke for 35 years, have lung issues.
Quit smoking, gain 11 pounds.
Sleep on an 18 year old mattress, have a sore back.

Nothing horrible, nothing earth-shaking, just irritating, especially because it's my own fricking fault.

This post brought to you by the letter W, for whining...

because all I can think of this a clip from Murphy Brown in which Candice Bergen, with the help of her castmates, sings the following song to a cigarette:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etObzeLEjDM&list=PL3067A5A3AAE31596&index=9

I have had one cigarette in the last week, and a very expensive boatload of nicotine gum and lozenges.  It has made me worry about how self-destructive I am, because even when I can feel that my lungs need me to quit, I still want to smoke.  I've gained seven pounds, and I know it's just a matter of keeping on, but damn, it's hard.  My boss and my mom are being super-supportive on a daily basis, and I know that my friends are there for me.  One pssstinking* day at a time.

*neologism courtesy of Smoke and Mirrors by Tanya Huff, a true 5-star book and one of my comfort reads.

Grr

I woke up at 6:20 a.m. and couldn't get back to sleep, which made me cranky and made the dog very happy because BREAKFAST NOW PLEASE.  So I got up, got dressed, and went to do my shopping.  I hit two grocery stores and the drugstore, finding everything except wintergreen lozenges for my little brother, then got gas and stopped at the warehouse store for lightbulbs, and then went to Staples, where I hit a snag--they don't open until 11 on Sundays. :-(

So it was home again and unload the groceries, change the sheets, unload the dishwasher and put new lightbulbs and decorations on the outdoor lights by the front door.  All that by 10:30 and I am Out Of Spoons.

Since I just can't make myself go back to the mall area on the Sunday before Christmas, I have now officially missed the shipping window for Christmas delivery to Jay and Mallie.  I know that they won't hold it against me, but I do.  I think Imma go take a nap now.

Not my best Sunday

Oof and oww.  My day started with me spilling coffee on the counter and into an open drawer full of clean dish cloths, and then I went on to haul two 40 pound bags of softener salt into the basement and doing laundry.  Then I hauled 10 or so houseplants in from the garage and hauled raw water up the basement stairs to give them and their 10 cousins who were already in the house a drink.  I stepped on a stone in the garage and got a bruise on my heel right through my slipper.  I am sore, tired, cranky and so not ready for work tomorrow.

On the other hand, my nails look pretty and it's a short week.  So I am saying good-bye to this day and going to bed early.

Today's menu: cranky with a side of I hate DST

One of my least favorite days of the year is the first work day after the ridiculousness that is "Spring Forward".  Seriously, Daylight Savings Time is stupid and harmful and I can complain about it for paragraphs, but I shall spare you.

Add in the fact that tomorrow is Call Day and I have a co-worker who didn't help me put together the list sniping at me over an omission and an attorney whining about how it doesn't fit in his schedule, then add in a brutal sinus headache on a pretty, sunshiny day, and you have a recipe for a grim day.

Right now I am thinking that I'm not going to mend the hem on my blue pants, just tape up the ripped stitches and fix them later.  Maybe next weekend.

Grrrr.

From Hell to Heaven in 36 hours

Yesterday was Monday on steroids, a seriously horrible day full of angry clients, sobbing clients, drama-queen Wards, paperwork and even when I came home and called Mom in Dallas, she had to hang up immediately because Tinkerbell had fallen off her bike (Tink's okay, thankfully).  I wanted to hide under the bed, or yanno, in it, because when I'm depressed, I sleep.  However, I decided it was too late in the day to nap.

So I nuked a cup of coffee and turned on the computer, and checked my e-mail and found something that cheered me right the heck up--an invitation to a salon opening from Zoya Nail Polish!  I sent my HELL YES response immediately, told all my friends, and then spent the rest of the evening until bedtime fussing over what I was going to wear.

I will post details and pictures at Bubbles and Baubles soon, but I will say tonight started with a name tag, a shampoo and blow-dry that left my hair looking stunning, continued with gourmet food and a serious swag bag, meeting a ton of great new people, including several Zoya polish fairies, as they are known, and Zoya herself!   It really was the perfect antidote to Monday. :D

The Most Boring Person on Earth

That would be me. I wake up, drink coffee, answer some want ads, go to work, come home, maybe go work out, eat dinner, read, play on the computer, play with nail polish, read some more, go to bed.

There are house finches nesting in the tree by the breezeway, which is fun.

There are nettles everywhere in my yard, which is not fun.

I have a ton of supplies to make nail polish jewelry, which is fun.

Other than that, there really isn't anything going on. The dogs are fine, I'm fine, the whole famdamily is fine. I just wish I could find a job for when Mom closes the office.

I think I have recovered from Monday...

I should have taken the flock of wild turkeys crossing my path as I drove to work as a hint from the universe and turned around and gone home!

A good man and good friend of the family died of lung cancer.

There were crises upon crises at work, and I'm finding that I do not function well with Mom out of the office for extensive periods.

I forgot my lunch and the soup of the day downstairs was broccoli cheddar (ick).

I ran out of antidepressant on Saturday.

In the line at the drive-through pharmacy, I was stuck inbetween two cars for fifteen minutes. Then when I got to the window, the pharmacy tech was moving like a glacier. If someone was in her way, she didn't go around them, she waited. She searched everywhere twice for my prescription, went back to the computer in between each location, and finally had to ask for help. It had been another seven minutes by the time she found it and ten by the time I was out of there.

The dogs were so hyper they nearly broke my fingers as I was trying to take Mouse off the chain and put Little Miss Piggie Pie on it.

When I took off my brand new earrings, one of them fell apart.

I would say the week got better, but since I woke up at 5 this morning with my third migraine in ten days, I can't. It's not getting worse, that's all.

Sick and tired

of being sick and tired. I've had this cold for nine days now, and now when I cough I get a sharp pain in my right side and I can't sleep for more than two hours without coughing. Functioning at work is interesting.

Mouse is doing well, thank heavens. He's eating, he bounces when I come home from work, and he's putting up with Little Miss Piggie Pie's efforts to play with him.

Long week

Even with the holiday on Monday, it's been a very long week. I have a nasty sinus infection and a really messy house. Mouse is starting to settle in, although Little Miss is bummed that he's not really interested in playing with her. She's very good about not over-pestering him, though, so yay for that!

The rental company where I used to work put an ad in the paper on Sunday, and I did some soul-searching and some list-making to see if I wanted to apply for the job. Back when I quit, I was specifically told that if I ever wanted to come back, I'd be hired. In the end, though, I remembered how unhappy I was at the end of my time there and decided I'd keep looking.

Hopefully, I can manage to find enough energy to at least do laundry and run the vacuum this weekend.

Bleah

It feels as though the compliment from Dr. N. was the last good thing that happened to me. There have been daily frustrations at work that I cannot write about and maintain client confidentiality because the situations are too unique to disguise. The weather has been chilly, which is good, but also rainy, which aggravates my allergies. And every time I bother Mom on her vacation with a work problem, I feel guilty for not being able to solve it on my own.

I am declaring that tomorrow is the start of a new week. Goldilocks and I are going to the Ohio Mart in the morning, then at dinnertime I am picking up Mom and Dad, and we are going out to dinner and will NOT talk about work at all.

It's gotta get better!

Yup, still alive

Just haven't felt very post-y. And just in case anyone was missing me, I'll stop that nonsense with the following whine about my Monday:


I started my day by flinging the dog's water all over the floor, discovered I was almost out of lettuce for my lunch salad, forgot to bring the hard copy of the work stuff I've been working on at home for the last three weekends and then got startled by a spider reeling down from my visor while I was driving!

Then work was fairly horrible, although I can actually say that someone literally moved my water dish--Vegan Lawyer rearranged the conference room and waiting room and took the water cooler out of the former and put it in the latter. Unlike a cat, though, I didn't die of dehydration.

Then some really tiny-dicked idiot in a compact felt it necessary to tailgate a middle-aged lady in a white Saturn wagon for three miles, because yeah, that does wonders for your street cred, asshole. Finally, at the store I found out that the food I researched so carefully to give Little Miss Piggie Pie the maximum amount of nutrition for the smallest impact on my wallet has completely reformulated and gone for a higher price point. Thank goodness for a lovely sales associate who knew what she was doing and helped me find a comparable brand.

Okay, whining over.

This is me:

First of all, I've been out of Lexapro since last Thursday and am continually on the verge of tears.

Second, we have three guardianships exploding with crazy family members right now.

Third, I'm planning to take Friday off, so there's a lot of frantic cramming going on at work.

Fourth, I do not want to be around people or have anything to do with any other human beings, so I have skipped working out since Saturday because the pool is a very chatty place.

Fifth and finally, Mom actually apologized for me today when I was angry with good reason with the staff at a nursing home.

I'll be in a ball with my spines out for the foreseeable future.

A week's worth of mudge

On Monday I found out that I have a blood clot in my left palm, and I'm now on stomach-killing NSAIDs to get rid of it.

On Tuesday I had to go to the dentist.

On Wednesday I started my day with being tailgated through hilly S-curves in the fog, then spent forty minutes on the phone with six different people just to change a contact phone number at the VA. The last hour of the day was spent frantically rushing around trying to get a Medicaid reapplication ready and mailed before 4:30 while a client showed up forty-five minutes early to read and sign her will. After I'd done all that and hurried home, I got to water-walking only to find out that the useless substitute was teaching the class.

This morning, I found out that the VA didn't correctly change the number, but they called Bosstopus at home last night with an appointment reminder instead of calling the veteran's nursing home.

I think I shall schedule a nervous breakdown for tomorrow.

Blue Jammies

Everyone knows that job-hunting sucks. I won't belabor that point.



But on a morning when the BigBoss at the office which kicked you and 149 other people to the curb sends EVERYONE an e-mail lauding one kickee for having a job specially created for her at a major medical center, wherein she will be meeting the president and many other VIPs, it just sucks to get a "Thanks but no thanks" e-mail less than 24 hours after you applied for a job.



I hate everything right now.

Back to the dentist

If you're squeamish, stop reading now.

Yesterday, I went out to Mom & Dad's to babysit while Mom went and put in five hours at the office. Dad has a cold, so he's being a complete baby and he slept all day (except for the forty-five minutes where he pushed the girls' craft projects out of the way and ate and read at the kitchen table). *eyeroll*

The girls were overall well-behaved, and we had fun, but my mouth was really sore. It felt as if the swelling had gotten much worse and my gum above the missing tooth was hot. Despite regular doses of ibuprofen, it wasn't any better this morning, and then when I was brushing my teeth, something snagged on the brush, which was how I discovered a bone sliver was working its way out.

Although the oral surgeon had done the extraction, my regular dentist squished me into her schedule. After a quick x-ray and exam, she came back with the Novocaine and told me the sliver was too big to allow it to work its own way out. As soon as I was numb, she enlarged the hole, pulled out the piece of bone, and showed it too me.

I am not exaggerating when I say that this sharp-edged, pointy piece of me that had decided to break loose was the size of my pinkie fingernail. Eeep! I wound up with three stitches in my mouth and an appointment on Tuesday to see the oral surgeon again for follow-up. I also feel as if someone has been beating on my gums with a mallet.

Ow.

The warranty on this body has run out...

can I trade it in? :(

The latest bad news came after a morning of fruitless phone tag at work, when I went to the dentist and discovered I need an extraction. Because it's the very last tooth in the back, my dentist feels that a root canal would be extremely difficult, expensive, and buy me at best three years before the tooth had to come out anyway. Oh, and it's also infected.

Could I just burst into flame?

Northeast Ohio is in the middle of a spate of gross summer heat (high today was 91), and given what happens to me when I'm out in it, I think I'd prefer to actually be a vampire.

Little Miss got herself stuck outside today, and in the time it took me to walk outside, unloop the chain and walk back in (less than a minute), both forearms and my chest blazed up with itchy redness. I didn't go near any plant material, I just got touched by sunlight.

I've never wanted to be a vampire, because the thought of drinking blood is disgusting. However, I've changed my mind. If I were a vampire, I wouldn't be one long enough to drink blood, I'd just go out in the sunlight and burst into flame.

Then I wouldn't be sitting here itching.

Gaaaaaaaaaaah

I hate summer. I hate sweating, I hate being heatsick, I hate being confined to air-conditioned offices and houses, and I hate the fact that my car AC doesn't work the way it should and I. HATE. SUMMER!

Does anyone other than my mother like DST?

Ick. It's back to getting up in the dark, getting headaches because I haven't slept enough, screwing up my circadian rhythms and just generally having my life messed up because one hundred ten years ago, the practice saved on lighting. Double ick.

To add to my general grumpishness, my nails are all either flaking or broken, I sliced a chunk of skin off my right index finger yesterday, and I still haven't done my taxes. I'd go back to bed, but I haven't changed the sheets.

Hmpf.