Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Sadness colors everything

I don't even know where to start to describe the last few days. If I start with the good things, my nephews were up for a visit last week, and Mom and I took them to an Akron Aeros game Friday night. Even though the Aeros lost, the fireworks were even better than last year's, and the boys had a good time. On Sunday, since Mom and Dad had to leave at 10:00 to get the boys back to Columbus, I was at my parents' house at 9:30 to give Dad his Father's Day card and gift, and he seemed to really like the book I got him. Then I headed home, stopping on the way at Temptation Nursery and picking up a peach-flowered verbena for Vegan Lawyer and two black and white dianthus for me. I spent the rest of the day doing laundry, putting away groceries, taking a nap, reading, goofing off on the computer.

I wish I could end there, with just the good things.

But I can't. Because on Friday morning, Mom found out that one of our probate court magistrates, someone I have known since I started working for Mom and someone Mom has known and worked with for twenty years, died utterly unexpectedly at the age of 53.

That loss has colored every day since then. I am sad for the court's loss of someone I thought should be our next probate judge, for community's loss of a woman with an impact above and beyond her job, for her sixteen-year-old daughter's loss. I wish I believed in a heaven, any heaven, and I wish I believed in a god or goddess or whomever would allow Ann to watch over her daughter, but mostly I just wish it hadn't happened.

If you've never had to hear a sixteen-year-old say through tears "I love my mom. I miss my mom." then count your blessings.

5 comments:

Sherri said...

I wish I didn't know exactly how she feels.

Sam Reeves said...

It knocked the props out from under me, losing my parents. I can only imagine how her daughter feels. I wish you all the best and swift healing.

Romantic Heretic said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, Jammies. *HUGS*

Mike S said...

i can safely say i have never heard a 16 year old say that, so i can't begin to imagine how heart braking it sounded.

In a way the two things you posted, while being exact opposites in nature, are tied together. It is cliche, but like most cliches there is a bit of truth. We aren't promised anything beyond today, and while its proper and right to mourn the passing of someone who was a part of your life , its also necessary to really enjoy each day for what you have. Humans, as a whole, tend to not do that too well.

Jammies said...

*hugs* Sherri and Sam. I'm sorry for bringing up sad memories for both of you.

Thank you, Rob.

Mike, thank you for a beautiful and very true comment.