Monday, May 16, 2011

Local politics

May 16, 2011

My City Council
My CouncilCritter

Dear CouncilCritter:

On tonight’s agenda is an amendment proposed by Representative Derp which would require Cuyahoga Falls residents to clean under birdfeeders and would also prohibit them from having compost heaps. As a long-time resident and taxpayer, I have several concerns with this legislation.

First, on the birdfeeder issue, Representative Derp alleged that fallen birdseed either rots or attracts “vermin” to the area under the birdfeeders, when in fact, fallen seed attract ground-feeding birds, including our state bird, the cardinal.

Second, on the compost issue, is there any solid evidence that there is an epidemic of improperly maintained compost in Cuyahoga Falls? If so, where is the data on this epidemic, how was the data gathered, and how was it evaluated? If there truly is such a problem, isn’t it better to start with education on correct composting rather than punishment? Perhaps the city could do more to let citizens know about the composting tips already available on the city website (by adding a flyer to utility bills, posting a notice in local newspapers, etc.).

Third, also on the compost issue, in these extremely difficult economic times, is it right to tell a homeowner or renter who is trying his best to be environmentally responsible, that the City of Cuyahoga Falls expects each homeowner to spend between $40-$200 the average homeowner may not have? The City will be collecting dozens, if not hundreds, of recycling bins in the next months—will there be a credit for turning in that much plastic? If so, the city should consider using that credit to pay for composting bins and provide them to residents instead of adding another financial burden to households quite probably already in straitened financial situations.

Finally, I ask the same question about both issues—who is going to enforce this, how is it going to be monitored, and are my tax dollars paying for this? Will health inspectors or police officers be sent on “seed patrol,” or will enforcement depend on tips from citizens? If the latter, not only is there a large potential for multiple problems based on misuse of any reporting system, the process would simply duplicate a right Cuyahoga Falls citizens already have, the right to pick up the telephone and call the health department and complain about an unsafe or unhealthy condition.

Given all of my objections, I would ask you both, as my representative and as president of the council, to vote No on this amendment.

Thank you for your anticipated attention to this matter

Very truly yours,

Citizen Jammies

P.S. Tell Mr. Derp to settle his difficulties with his neighbors by negotiating with them, not by trying to pass laws that screw up the budgets and lives of the rest of us.


Sherri said...

1) *snerk*
2) WTF?
3) You aren't kiddin', are you?
4) DERP! :D
5) Bwahahahaha!

Jammies said...

1) Glad you liked it.
2) I know.
3) Sadly, no.
4) He is!
5) I sent the whole thing except for the P.S. to my CouncilCritters via e-mail.

Becs said...

If government is so jerkish on a local level, just imagine the scale of the federal government. I cry now.