1. You need a new shovel.
2. The morning after a hard rain is a great time to pull up unwanted saplings and other weeds.
3. When you are pulling up something rooted deeply, brace yourself or plan to land on your butt. Hard.
4. If you are standing facing uphill and you hear a jet, do not tip your head back to look for it, or plan to land on your butt. Hard.
5. Your neighbors now have conclusive proof that you are crazy if they heard you apologize to the trees you were trimming.
6. You need a new nail brush!
7. Your co-workers do not need to know that you habitually turn a towel into lekku after your shower.
8. Your true friends, on the other hand, will be delighted.
